*This post originally penned 9/14/17* Dear Carter, Today, it’s been 112 days since you left. 112 days since I held you. 112 days since I saw your face. 112 days since I kissed you. Today, you’ve been gone longer than you were here. Today is a hard day. Today, I miss you just as much… Continue reading 112
Dear Carter, Happy 6 month birthday! All of my thoughts today are full of you. I woke up so angry that you had to leave. And as the day has passed, I’ve felt lots of other emotions swirling around. Of course, sadness, because I miss you so much. Fear. Guilt. Weariness. I’ve cried once. So far. But… Continue reading 6 months
Dear Carter, Today, Daddy and I got married! Remember the words we said when you were in the hospital bed, while we held your hands and promised to love each other, and to love you, forever? While the machine breathed for you and the monitors showed us that your brain was too injured to work… Continue reading July 19, 2017: Wedding Day!
Dear Carter, Today at 7:10 pm, EST, I got a text from your Gigi that your new baby cousin was born. We thought the baby was on the way about 3 weeks ago, but it was a false alarm, so we’ve been anxiously waiting for what seems like forever. Auntie and Uncle didn’t find out… Continue reading Happy birthday, cousin!
Dear Carter, Today is July 4th. Today is America’s birthday. Today you would have been 5 months old. Today I was supposed to be taking your monthly pictures and marveling at how much you grew. Today we were supposed to venture downtown to our special spot to watch the fireworks and then go home and… Continue reading Fireworks
Dear Carter, I haven’t written you a letter in a few days. I got a new job and I’ve been busy learning and going to a million meetings. It’s good in a way, to be so busy at work that my thoughts aren’t consumed by how much I miss you. But then I get in… Continue reading The small things
Dear Carter, Today I wrote you a poem. Before, I was naïve Complacent and unaware Of what tragedy may fall Of the depths of the love I would feel And the darkness of missing Your smell Your cry Your mouth at my breast Before, I had sparkly eyes And common complaints No sleep Fussy… Continue reading Before and After